How to Get Your Husband to be More Sensitive: Love is the Answer

Some husbands are instinctively sensitive to the needs and desires of their wives, while there may be little or no demonstrable sensitivity shown by others.

Husbands are unique individuals. How they interact with, and in response to their wives in terms of sensitivity has no hard and fast rules, but when there is a lack of sensitivity, marital problems can arise.    

Understanding sensitivity can be beneficial with respect to the question of how to get your husband to be more sensitive.   

What does it mean to be sensitive?

According to dictionary.com, the word sensitive suggests the following meaning: “endowed with sensation “or “having perception through the senses”.

Sensation and perception are two major factors in sensitivity. Husbands normally have varying degrees of sensitivity towards their wives. Wives have varying degrees of sensitivity towards their husbands.  

Sensitive may imply one “readily or excessively affected by external agencies or influences”.

Husbands are not alike in terms of responding to others and the world around them; each husband acts and reacts as an individual. The degree husbands respond in terms of sensitivity to their wives varies considerably in terms of   “having acute mental or emotional sensibility: awareness of and responsiveness to the feelings of others”. In other words, some husbands are acutely aware of the feelings of their wives, while others are not. Some husbands are “easily pained or annoyed” with their wives and others.  

How to get your husband to be more sensitive is like trying to change any other aspect of your husband’s personality. It is not always feasible, realistic or successful. At the same time, there are positive, constructive things that you as a wife can do that may prove beneficial in terms of how to get your husband to be more sensitive.

Effective communication:

Many problems arising in marriages have to do with problematic communication, as opposed to a lack of sensitivity on the part of a husband. In other words, effective communication can help to resolve issues related to sensitivity.

For example, a husband might say, “You should have told me,” and suggest that he was unaware of an existing problem and might have responded differently had there been better communication. Keeping the doors of communication open is always important.  

Awareness, recognition and acknowledgment of an existing problem:

Awareness is vital in terms of recognition and acknowledgement of problems in marital situations, but levels of perception may differ between husbands and wives. Being aware of how your husband perceives can lead to measures that help to increase his sensitiveness. 

A husband might argue, “I don’t see things the way you do.” When a husband and wife have differing perceptions, there can be conflict. Coming to a mutual understanding may prove helpful.

Proactive goal setting:

Changing an insensitive husband into a sensitive husband requires the awareness, recognition and acknowledgement of an existing problem in conjunction with mutual goal setting. A wife can set goals alone, but struggle indefinitely until her husband becomes aware, recognizes and acknowledges the reality of the problem and agrees to goal setting directed towards effective resolution. 

Rewards and incentives:

Positive rewards and incentives often lead a husband to become more sensitive towards his wife. Giving praise for sensitivity, particularly in front of family members and friends, works wonders. Setting an example by demonstrating sensitivity towards him and others, will lead him to react or interact with more sensitivity towards you, your children, parents and others.  

Few husbands are emotionally bankrupt in terms of sensitivity towards their spouses, but there may be times when a husband is depressed and unable to respond appropriately to the needs and desires of a wife.

A medical or psychological assessment can help to resolve health related issues and diagnose problems resulting in insensitivity. Family therapy or professional, Christian counseling may also prove helpful, as well, because forgiveness and love go a long way in problem resolution.